The Perils of Social Networking
by willsy83
Summary: Quinn updates her social network relationship status, and the gleeks are more than a little curious. Faberry with mentions of past Finchel and Samcedes, with current 3C and Brittana. One-shot. Rated T for language/swearing.


**A/N: Had this idea for a while, it's not perfect but it's as good as it's going to get, let me know what you think!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

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**The Perils of Social Networking**

7/10/12

**Quinn Fabray** went from 'single' to 'it's complicated'.

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** So what unlucky guy got snared into your particular brand of crazy this time? And why the fuck are you friends with Berry?

**Santana Fucking Lopez **and **Rachel Barbra Berry **are now friends

**Rachel Barbra Berry** just wrote on **Santana Fucking Lopez**'s wall:

- Sorry it took me so long to accept your friend request Santana but I've been awfully busy attending dance classes and vocal lessons and packing for New York. (You and **7 others** like this)

**Santana Fucking Lopez** tagged a picture of you.

**Quinn Fabray **to **Santana Fucking Lopez**:

- What the Hell Santana? You swore you got rid of that photo!

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** Yeah like I was ever gonna delete that leverage.

**Finn Hudson:** Wait, so who's the girl in the picture?

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **Can't you read Lurch? It's Lucy Caboosey.

**Quinn Fabray: **Fuck you airbags.

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **You wish ;) **(Lauren Zizes** likes this)

**Sam Evans** wrote on your wall:

- So you never answered the question, who's it 'complicated' with?

**Quinn Fabray: ** If I wanted you to know that I would've put it on my wall, wouldn't I?

**Mercedes Jones: **Well I know it's no one on the football team, Shane would've told me.

**Sam Evans: **So you guys are still together, huh?

**Mercedes Jones:** Yeah, why?

**Sam Evans: **No reason.

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman: **It's cause he wants to bone you Hot Chocolate.

**Sam Evans:** NO! I was just curious. Besides, we're getting off topic here.

**Kurt Hummel: **Indeed we are. You can't deflect us on this one Quinn, you're dealing with the two biggest gossips/spies at McKinley.

**Brittany Pierce: **You're a spy Kurt? That's so cool! (**Santana Fucking Lopez**, **Kurt Hummel** and **Mercedes Jones** like this)

**Kurt Hummel: **Just a spy for the juicy gossip at McKinley Brittany.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **May I point out Kurt that you're starting to sound like Jacob Ben Israel? And the rest of you should back off, it's really none of your business who Quinn happens to be dating. (**You** like this)

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7/13/12

You are now friends with **Joe Hart**

You were tagged at _**The Lima Bean, Lima Ohio**_ with **Rachel Barbra Berry**

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman: **Looks like the end of the world is near folks.

**Rachel Barbra Berry** wrote on your wall:

- Thanks again for the coffee this morning Quinn, and for helping with my moving itinerary.

**Quinn Fabray: **No problem Berry, you've helped me enough with glee assignments :)

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** Be that as it may, I very much appreciate it, I would hate to accidentally leave something important behind due to poor planning.

**Quinn Fabray:** I doubt that would happen, but you're still welcome.

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **Okay, what the fuck is going on here? You're nice to each other, you meet for coffee to do an 'itinerary'…

**Brittany Pierce:** Leave them alone Sanny.

**Quinn Fabray:** Yeah Sanny, back off.

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** Don't start with me Fabray or Snix is officially off the leash.

**Brittany Pierce:** Santana Lopez! If you don't stop right now, I'm cutting you off for a week!

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **Damn…sorry baby. And sorry to you Quinn…and Berry I guess.

**Brittany Pierce:** That's better. Now don't forget you're meeting me tomorrow at 12.30 to feed the ducks and then we're going to my place for naked times.

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** Aw Britt, please don't do that here, that's supposed to be private.

**Brittany Pierce:** Why? Everyone knows we go to feed the ducks together. (**You**, **Rachel Barbra Berry** and **17 others** like this)

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7/14/12

**Brittany Pierce **and **Santana Fucking Lopez** were tagged at _**Hawg Creek, Lima Ohio**_

**Quinn Fabray:**

**- **Is having the best summer ever

**Kurt Hummel: **Don't take this the wrong way Quinn but you seem…happy.

**Quinn Fabray: **Is there something wrong with that?

**Kurt Hummel: **Of course not, it's just not something I'm used to seeing.

**Quinn Fabray:** Well maybe I just got tired of being miserable. I get to see Beth, I have good friends, and I'm headed to Yale in a few months.

**Kurt Hummel: **And I'm sure this has nothing to do with a certain someone you were spotted holding hands with outside Breadstix last night.

**Quinn Fabray: **I swear to God Hummel if you finish that thought I'll make you wish you'd never been born.

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7/16/12

**Rachel Barbra Berry** wrote on your wall:

- Quinn are you okay? I tried to call yesterday but your phone was off all day, and when I called your house your mom said you were sick.

**Quinn Fabray: **I'm fine.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **…Are you sure?

**Quinn Fabray: **Yes I'm sure, otherwise I wouldn't say I'm fine, would I?

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** Okay, I guess. Well, you know where I am if you need me.

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7/17/12

**Kurt Hummel** wrote on your wall:

- I'm sorry about what I said Quinn, you're allowed to be happy. I promise I won't tell anyone who I saw you with.

**Santana Fucking Lopez** wrote on your wall:

- Yo Q what's goin on? I texted you at least 20 times today.

**Brittany Pierce** wrote on your wall:

- I heard you're sick, Lord Tubbington hopes you feel better and so do I. Sanny does too.

**Sam Evans **wrote on your wall:

- Hope you feel better Quinn.

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7/18/12

**Quinn Fabray:**

- Thanks for the concern guys (even you Lopez) but honestly I'm fine so don't worry

**Judy Fabray, Rachel Barbra Berry** and **6 others** like this

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **Thank you for calling last night, I was really worried.

**Quinn Fabray: **No problem, and I'm sorry I was so rude to you yesterday.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **Already forgotten. Are you still coming to help me pack for New York this weekend?

**Quinn Fabray: **As long as you're still helping me x

You were tagged at _**Breadstix, Lima Ohio**_ with **Kurt Hummel **and **Blaine Anderson**

You wrote on **Kurt Hummel**'s wall:

- I can't believe you told Mercedes!

**Mercedes Jones: **Oh come on, it's not like I'll tell anyone, girl.

**Tina CC: **You told me yesterday over brunch.

**Quinn Fabray: **WHAT THE HELL MERCEDES!?

**Mercedes Jones: **Okay I may have let it slip to Tina, but she won't tell anyone.

**Quinn Fabray: **That's what Kurt said about you!

**Tina CC: **I may have mentioned it to Mike. But I swear I didn't know it was a secret, by the time I hear these things everyone usually already knows!

**Quinn Fabray: **Oh this is just perfect.

**Mike Chang** wrote on your wall:

- Hey Quinn, Tina asked me to tell you that I definitely haven't told anyone what she told me.

**Quinn Fabray: **Well at least someone isn't a total gossip.

**Brittany Pierce, Santana Fucking Lopez** and **Rachel Barbra Berry** were tagged at _**Breadstix, Lima Ohio**_.

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman:** Okay I was wrong the other day, _this_ is the sign of the end of the world.

**Brittany Pierce** wrote on your wall:

- I'm so happy for you Quinn!

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** I personally think it'll make me vomit if I think about it too much.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **I hope you don't mind that I told them, they are your best friends after all and in the circumstances I guessed they'd understand.

**Quinn Fabray: **It's fine Rach, half the glee club knows by this point.

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** What do you mean?

**Kurt Hummel:** I told Blaine of course. But I also told Mercedes, who told Tina, who told Mike. Fortunately Mike has some self-control and the chain ended there.

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** I'm so sorry Quinn, I know you didn't want anyone to know.

**Quinn Fabray: **I hardly think it's your fault Rach, don't be sorry.

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** I'm still sorry. And ignore Santana's comment, she cried and hugged me when I told her.

**Brittany Pierce: **It's true, she's such a softie (**15 people** like this)

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7/20/12

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman**:

- Wants to know what the fuck is going on? (**Finn Hudson **and **Sam Evans** like this)

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **None of your business, now I suggest you get on with your own lives rather than creeping other peoples.

**Finn Hudson:** If something's going on with Quinn I think I have a right to know.

**Quinn Fabray: **Excuse me a _right_ to know? You lost that right when you accused me of lying and tried to drag me out of my wheelchair at Prom.

**Joe Hart: **Preach.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **WHAT? Why did I not know about this?

**Finn Hudson: **I thought she was lying, it wouldn't be the first time.

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** EXCUSE ME Lurch? And since when have you been a saint?

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **Exactly, I seem to remember you dumping me so you could sleep around, not telling me when you slept with Santana, not telling Quinn when you kissed me in the auditorium.

**Finn Hudson:** Total different. Besides at least I'm not a chronic liar and a bitch like Quinn.

**Judy Fabray: **I think you may have forgotten I'm on here Mr Hudson?

**Carole Hudson:** And me. I suggest you get off the laptop right now and come to the dining room before I drag you down here.

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7/21/12

**Santana Fucking Lopez:**

- So how many people unfriended Sasquatch today?

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **Definitely me, I can't believe I almost married that clown.

**Quinn Fabray:** I think it goes without saying that I did.

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman:** Me too, no one messes with my baby mama.

**Kurt Hummel: **There's no way I can defend him after that, I've just removed him.

**Mercedes Jones: **Me too, in the words of Barack Obama, what a jackass.

**Tina CC: **Me too.

**Sam Evans: **I can't believe you never told me about that thing at Prom Quinn, he's off my list.

**Joe Hart: **I never added him cause I only got a computer like a week ago, but I'd totally delete him if I had.

**Lauren Zizes: **I deleted him, you want me to kick him in the nuts Fabray? (**You** like this)

**Mike Chang:** Me too. The deleting part, not the nut kicking.

**Brittany Pierce:** You know I did Sanny, you had to show me how to do it.

**Blaine Anderson: **Normally I'd say he deserves a chance to explain himself, but considering how he spent the night ranting about how hard it is for him not to know what his ex-girlfriend is doing, why she's spending so much time with his ex-fiancee, why his ex-fiancee won't take him back after he dumped her for what, the hundredth time? I'm gonna say…deleted.

**Santana Fucking Lopez:** Douche. Finn, not you Blaine.

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7/22/12

**Quinn Fabray** to** Rachel Barbra Berry:**

**- **Well I guess we might as well just tell everyone at this point, most of them know anyway.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **It's up to you, I've been ready for a while.

**Quinn Fabray: **Okay…

You are in a relationship with **Rachel Barbra Berry** (**14 people **like this)

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman:** I've said it before and I'll say it again, the end of the world approaches. Also, I'm gonna need some photographic evidence.

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **Wanky.

**Quinn Fabray: **Perverts.

**Santana Fucking Lopez: **So that's what those rail passes were all about.

**Quinn Fabray: ** I may have had an ulterior motive.

**Sam Evans:** Now I get it, congrats guys

**Judy Fabray: **So now that everybody knows does that mean you'll invite her over for dinner? And I'm watching you Puckerman. And Santana do you really have to list that as your name?

**Noah The Puckasaurus Puckerman: **Eep.

**Santana Lopez: **Sorry Momma Fabray.

**Quinn Fabray:** Once you've finished bullying my friends, yes mom I'll ask her over for dinner.

**Rachel Barbra Berry: **Is it too needy if I guarantee I'll say yes when you ask?

**Quinn Fabray: **No, it's cute ;)

**Santana Lopez:** I may vomit.

**Brittany Pierce:** Congrats guys! And Santana thinks you're cute.

**Kurt Hummel: **Just a heads up, one of Finn's old football buddies saw this and told him, he's already kicking defenceless chairs.

**Quinn Fabray**: We both leave in a few months, I don't honestly think I could care less.

**Rachel Barbra Berry:** Me either.

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7/23/12

**Will Schuester:**

- Sorry guys I haven't been online in a few days, what have I missed? (**13 people** like this)

_The End_

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Couldn't resist Mr Schue being late again ;)


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